A marriage proposal is a very exciting moment for any man, and the question often arises: on which finger do they put the ring on when proposing to a girl? It would seem such a simple nuance, but, as it turns out, young people often do not know what and how to do at this moment. Let's figure out where this tradition comes from and how it is done today.
Which finger should I wear my engagement ring on?
Wearing a ring given by the groom is a symbol that the girl is not free and plans to soon marry her chosen one. Immediately after the marriage proposal, the future bride puts a ring on her finger if she accepts the marriage proposal.
Which hand is the ring worn on?
Each country has its own traditions associated with wedding rituals. When watching Western films and TV series, you can see that a girl who agrees to get married puts a ring on the ring finger of her left hand. It is a Slavic tradition to wear engagement and wedding rings on the right hand.
In Russia, Belarus and Ukraine, wearing a wedding ring on the left hand means that a woman is divorced or widowed. To avoid confusion, it is better to put the engagement ring on the same hand that will be adorned with a wedding ring after a short time.
The question of which finger to wear an engagement ring on is equivalent in both Western and Slavic cultures. The ring is worn on the ring finger.
History of the custom
Like many other rituals, this significant sign of engagement between young people has its own history. The most famous versions of the appearance of the custom:
- Eastern . The tradition began in ancient Egypt. The decoration was supposed to be made of gold and symbolized the fidelity and love of the young. At that time, it was generally accepted that wearing a ring on a certain finger had its own meaning. Aphrodite, the goddess of love, corresponded to the ring finger, so wearing a ring on it symbolized love and quick marriage.
- Slavic . In pagan times, it was believed that the ring finger was protected by Yarilo, the god of the Sun and the patron of life throughout the earth. The Slavic engagement ring had to be smooth - it was believed that ornaments and curls interfered with the sacred action of the deity. The women's ring was cast from gold - a “male” metal. The girl presented her future husband with a silver jewelry personifying the feminine essence. According to the beliefs of the Slavs, the combination of two principles in one family gave rise to harmony and love.
Mistakes you shouldn't make when giving an engagement ring
A man presents jewelry to his chosen one at the moment when he wants to propose marriage to her.” If the bride agrees, then from that time on the couple is considered engaged. A girl can wear jewelry on her right or left ring finger.
A man is not always able to choose the right ring and please his chosen one with his choice. Let's tell you more about what mistakes men make and how to avoid them.
Don't confuse an engagement ring with a wedding ring
It is incorrect to call an engagement ring a wedding ring. These are 2 different decorations and each of them has a specific function. The wedding ring is worn only after marriage. Wedding rings are displayed on the fingers throughout the entire period of marriage. Traditional wedding rings should not have ornate designs or gemstones. Their surface is smooth. To ensure a strong and harmonious union, it is recommended to choose rings for the bride and groom in the same style.
The form of decoration can be any - it all depends on the imagination of the groom and the preferences of his chosen one. The ring can be put on immediately after gifting. It is not necessary to wear it all the time. The main difference between engagement and wedding jewelry is that it is usually only worn by the woman (the man does not have a matching pair).
There are situations when the first proposal is made not by a man, but by a woman. She can present him with an engagement ring as a sign of attention. The chosen one is given jewelry without precious stones, but it is desirable that they have an engraving on them.
Be sure to take into account the lady's taste preferences
A lady can wear an engagement ring not only before the wedding, but all the time. Therefore, it is important that it matches the other jewelry on her hands. You cannot give silver jewelry to girls who wear mostly gold. Such a ring will stand out on your hand and look unaesthetic.
The most popular metals
for an engagement ring are gold and platinum.
Often jewelry is set with a precious stone. When choosing engagement jewelry, men need to take into account the taste preferences of their beloved. To do this, you need to pay attention to what other rings the lady has or ask the chosen one about what she prefers. A correctly chosen decoration will emphasize not only the wealth and serious intentions of the groom, but also his attentive attitude towards his beloved.
Be careful when giving family jewelry
Folk traditions do not prohibit the use of engagement and wedding jewelry for close relatives . But this is only possible if the relatives have lived a happy family life and celebrated a silver wedding.
If it is not possible to buy new jewelry, and the owners of the old ones could not boast of a happy union, then the best thing to do would be to melt down the rings. The melted material also carries negative energy, but to a lesser extent than the product itself. You can cleanse the ring from an unfavorable aura by contacting professional healers. With the help of rites and rituals, they will charm the decoration for a long and happy family marriage.
Avoid purchasing oblong-shaped jewelry
The shape plays an important role in choosing an engagement ring. It is not recommended to give the chosen one rings that are oblong in shape and have sharp protrusions. Such a ring symbolizes misunderstanding and frequent quarrels in a couple.
The classic version of what an engagement ring looks like is a round-shaped piece with precious stones. Suitable stones for framing a ring are emeralds, diamonds or malachite.
Select jewelry that is appropriate in size
One of the main mistakes men make is choosing wedding rings by eye. An inappropriately sized piece of jewelry can ruin a lady’s mood and cause a quarrel. There are several ways to avoid making a mistake with the size:
- Find out the necessary information from the girl’s mother, sister or close friend
. The disadvantage of this method is that a friend or relative may let it slip and then there will be no surprise. Therefore, you need to consider additional ways to find out the size of your beloved’s finger. - Unnoticed, take your loved one’s jewelry and go with it to the jewelry store.
This method is also not ideal. If a girl finds out about the loss, she may react inadequately to the situation and accuse the guy of theft. - Try on your loved one's ring on your finger
. This is one of the best ways for guys whose memory fails. You can take a ring from your beloved and try it on your finger as a joke. In this case, the guy must record and remember exactly at what level of his finger the beloved ring is stuck. - Ask your chosen one for the necessary information
. It is advisable to do this several months before the expected time of engagement. The girl will expect a proposal in the near future and, having not received it, will let the situation go from her mind. In this case, it will be easier for a man to surprise her and give her an unexpected surprise.
Another option on how to give a ring correctly is to first propose, and then go with your chosen one to a jewelry store. The lady can choose the jewelry she likes.
What kind of engagement rings are given?
Unlike a wedding ring, an engagement ring does not have to be smooth and simple in shape. On the contrary, the presence of precious and semi-precious stones, ornaments or curls made of metal are only welcome. The classic version of an engagement ring is one large stone surrounded by small ones on a smooth rim.
Of course, there are no strict rules for the shape of this precious gift - you can choose any metal, any shape and any stones. The best choice is taking into account the tastes of the future bride. Even if a girl doesn't wear rings, her choice of clothes, accessories and other accessories can tell you which ring she'll like.
Tradition or not?
The tradition of giving an engagement ring goes back to ancient times, when, as a sign of true love and devotion, the groom gave the bride’s parents various jewelry (scarves, ribbons), trying to show that he was wealthy and could support his beloved.
Now this tradition is being eroded, but almost every girl dreams and waits for her beloved to propose his hand and heart along with an engagement ring. This ring will become a real symbol of your relationship and will preserve the exciting moment of engagement. An engagement ring will help you express your boundless love.
What stones can be in an engagement ring?
Traditionally, engagement is considered to be a major step in adulthood. That is why it is not customary to save money when choosing engagement jewelry. Classic stones in the ring:
- diamond;
- sapphire;
- emerald.
Also, semi-precious stones are often used:
- amethysts;
- topaz.
Most often you can find options made of gold of various shades (white, lemon, pink), but other metals are also popular: silver, platinum, tungsten, titanium.
If the future groom is short on funds, he can opt for a budget option for an engagement ring. But if there are no problems with finances, there is no need to skimp - the girl will certainly appreciate the broad gesture.
What stones and metals are not suitable for engagement rings?
As for metals, cheap, fragile and visually unattractive materials would be inappropriate in this matter. For example, pure 999.9 gold is definitely inappropriate, since it is soft in structure and will sooner or later be damaged. Impurities of copper and silver increase the strength, thanks to which different color shades of gold are obtained.
The choice of stones is a purely personal matter for everyone. According to traditions collected all over the world, it is customary to get engaged with rings with durable, valuable stones. The most striking example of this is a diamond.
Important! There are also those rings that are associated with negative signs, for example, opal with misfortune or pearls with tears.
How to wear an engagement ring before and after wedding?
In Russia, it is customary to wear one wedding ring after a wedding, removing the engagement ring from your finger. But traditions tend to change and now the bride has the following options:
- Before the wedding, wear an engagement ring, and after the wedding, take it off and wear a wedding ring.
- Wear both jewelry at the same time. They are usually worn on one finger.
- Wear an engagement ring as a separate accessory for special occasions. This option is most relevant if the value of the jewelry is significant or if it is heirloom.
In the West, you can often encounter the tradition of passing rings to the younger generation of your family for engagement. This is a very touching custom that promotes closeness between generations.
Another wonderful custom is that the groom himself participates in the development of the decoration design. In this case, the ring becomes valuable not only because of the number of precious stones, but also because of the personal contribution of the future husband.
If you plan to wear both rings together after your wedding, you'll want to make sure they match. Despite the fact that in modern fashion there are no strict rules for combining jewelry with each other, rings of a similar design and the same shade of gold will look more impressive.
A little history...
According to historians, the first rings that grooms gave to brides appeared in Ancient Egypt. Such rings were made independently from any suitable metal. However, their meaning was somewhat different - they were simply symbols of love, endless, for life; their giving was not timed to coincide with any ritual or holiday.
Over time, the tradition changed and acquired other colors. Thus, already in Ancient Greece and Ancient Rome, rings were given as a gift for engagement (and, according to some evidence, the gift was intended not for the girl, but for her parents). In this simple way, the man demonstrated that he was able to provide for his family and was ready to bear responsibility for his future wife.
After the adoption of Christianity in Europe, the tradition became even more deeply rooted. This was facilitated by the policies of the Popes. For example, the Church demanded that grooms prove their wealth and wealth by giving the bride a beautiful ring. At first, the requirements were too high - the rings had to be made of gold, but later it was allowed to give silver and iron bands.
The first diamond engagement ring (which later became a classic of the genre) was given to Mary of Burgundy by Duke Maximilian of Austria at the end of the 15th century. Of course, he received consent, because in those conditions he approached the issue with creativity.
In Western Europe, an engagement with a ring has acquired beautiful traditions and options for the development of the event over the centuries - going down on one knee, proposing in restaurants, practical jokes that are amazing in their scale, etc. As for Orthodox countries, this tradition is not so widespread. Noble families, of course, tried to follow Western fashion, but in ordinary families everything was simpler, although the ritual of engagement or conspiracy always existed. The Church has never opposed giving rings to brides. On the contrary, this symbol of love was perceived positively. However, one should be more modest, because modesty is the true adornment of a person.
Is it possible to take off the engagement ring?
Traditions are quite unanimous on this matter - if a girl takes off her ring, she doubts her choice of a future husband. All folk signs say that love will be strong and family happiness cloudless only if it is worn constantly.
Doctors, on the contrary, recommend periodically removing the jewelry to avoid constant interference with blood circulation in the finger. Also, safety regulations in some professions prohibit wearing rings while working.
Whether to follow popular beliefs or do what is more convenient is up to your family to decide. After all, a strong marriage is much more than jewelry and rules for wearing it.
Men's myths about the engagement ring
Before giving practical advice on choosing the ideal ring for your chosen one, it is worth debunking some axioms that have developed in the practical male mind.
“Similar to a friend’s…”
A woman is a creature with a heightened need to be unique and special. And although God forbids indulging in the development of narcissism, yet on the day of engagement even He can forgive a slight deviation from the rules. Never, under any circumstances, should you buy a bride-to-be a ring that looks like the one that was given to her friend or that was advertised in promotions. Even if a girl enthusiastically praises this decoration, she will still expect something special for herself.
“The first one that came along!”
If a man does not make an effort and buys the first thing he is offered, then the woman will definitely notice it. She is the one to wear the ring, so you should take the time to find the best option. But imagine what kind of hero you will be in the eyes of the bride if you tell her that you ran around a dozen jewelry stores to find a diamond to match the color of her eyes or a ring with just such an ensemble of stones.
“I’ll buy a ring with diamond chips - she likes it to sparkle...”
Unfortunately, girls are very superstitious, especially when it comes to wedding matters. To make it even more unfortunate, they know a huge number of such superstitions, and the ones they don’t know, their friends will happily tell them. Therefore, we place those that touch the ring:
- diamond chips symbolize a “broken” heart;
- ruby – blood;
- pearls - tears;
- opal - misfortune.
“Yes, you need to be an expert to choose!”
Not at all, you may have to be a detective a little to find out your girlfriend’s desires, but choosing the right ring is not so difficult. You can write down on paper all the sketchy information that you were able to extract from your chosen one and retell it to the consultant in the salon - they will definitely find something suitable for you.
“One big, big diamond is better than 2-3 smaller ones”
It is not true! Not many girls will wear a “cobblestone” on their arm - it’s terribly inconvenient. The Church generally encourages you to be more modest, because your engagement is a personal matter, and you shouldn’t brag about your personal things to the whole world. You are marrying for yourself, not for others.
Where is the best place to buy an engagement ring?
You can buy proposal rings at any jewelry store or order an exclusive piece of jewelry from a jeweler based on your own design. In some families, it is customary to pass the engagement ring from generation to generation.
But if all these options are not for you, then consider the options presented in the Orthodox online store PravLife. We have a wide selection of products, reasonable prices, and excellent purchasing conditions. We will deliver your order to any point in Moscow and Russia, and at the same time you will save your own time (after all, choosing on the Internet is always simpler and easier than searching for what you need in different stores). Our consultants will help you with your choice if you have any difficulties.
Are engagement rings suitable for proposing?
Is it possible to propose with an engagement ring? The classic versions of these rings vary greatly in design: the engagement ring looks like a smooth gold band, while the engagement ring is a model with a single diamond. It is not right for your bride to wear her engagement ring until the wedding. At the same time, there are a number of cases when wedding rings are given as an engagement gift:
- You're proposing with your family's heirloom piece—expensive in both value and significance.
- You are giving a real exclusive, which by design cannot be clearly called an engagement or wedding gift.
- You choose a universal wedding and engagement model.
The Palace's wedding collections also include such rings. They are easy to recognize: if engagement models have small stones, and engagement models always have a soloist - a large stone, then universal engagement rings have both, like a ring with diamonds and sapphire.
Engagement ring with diamonds 921643B
How to please the bride
Usually, preparations for the presentation of the engagement ring are carried out secretly from the future bride, so that this event becomes a real surprise for her. Therefore, asking a girl directly about her preferences or, as if by chance, taking her to a jewelry store and offering to try something on is not the best solution.
1. First of all, it’s worth taking a closer look at what kind of jewelry she prefers in everyday life. What metal are these products made of, what is their size and style. It’s very good if the ring matches your girlfriend’s favorite piece of jewelry that she wears all the time.
2. If you want to give a ring not with a diamond, but with some other stone, you can ask which one suits the bride according to her zodiac sign.
3. The shape of the stone cut, especially if it is large, should correspond to the size of the hand. If it is wide, then an oval, elongated stone will look good. On short fingers, medium-width rings look better. A not very wide ring with an elongated, teardrop-shaped or round stone of medium size can visually make thick fingers appear narrower.
The main condition when choosing is not to overdo it with decorations. The ring should not be massive; it is better if it looks gentle and sophisticated.
Engagement Ring Designs
Engagement rings can come in a variety of designs. For example, classic-style products are made with one or more round-cut stones.
If you want an unusual ring, you should take a closer look at jewelry with original designs. They can use colored diamonds or a whole scattering of stones, non-standard cutting of stones, matte or glossy polishing of the metal.
Rings in the Art-design style will not be banal. For example, products can be made in a vintage style, using non-traditional materials.
An exclusive, custom-made engagement ring will also be of interest.
The advantage of this approach is that jewelers will be able to take into account all your wishes, come up with an original design and, if desired, add engraving. But when ordering a ring, remember that it is important to correctly calculate the time it will take to produce it, select the stone, and test it. Order the product in advance so as not to worry about its readiness on the eve of the engagement.
This is interesting!
One of the most expensive engagement rings is on the finger of actress Jessica Alba, who received a 5-carat diamond worth 100,000 (one hundred thousand) dollars as a gift from Cash Warren.
Jessica Biel's ring is even more expensive. Her fiancé gave her a ring made of white gold and black radon for 130,000 (one hundred and thirty) dollars. In addition to the 18-carat diamond decoration, two aquamarines are delicately placed on the ring.
Victoria Beckham wears a ring worth 250,000 (two hundred and fifty) thousand dollars.
Jennifer Garner – 500,000 (five hundred) thousand dollars.
But Elizabeth Taylor received from her husband a product of more than 33 carats for 880,000 (eight hundred eighty) thousand dollars.
Among Russian celebrities,
Anna Kournikova is the lucky one. In 2004, her fiance Enrique Iglesias made a gift of 6,000,000 (six million) dollars. The ring is gracefully decorated with an 11-carat pink diamond.
For Nikolai Baskov, the ring presented to Oksana Fedorova at the time of engagement cost $100,000. And although the star couple is not together, the fact of an expensive gift went down in history.
The story of the distant Austrian Duke Maximilian also became a historical fact. Allegedly, in 1477, he fell in love with the daughter of the King of France, the famous Mary of Burgundy.
Maria was a rich heiress and many suitors offered her their hand and heart. Maximilian thought for a long time about how to express his feelings and decided to give the princess an expensive ring with a large diamond. As soon as Maria saw the ring, she said with delight: “Yes!”
How to guess the size
If you have decided on the cost, then all that remains is to find out the size of the product. This is a difficult task, it is important to be cunning. A friend of your chosen one who knows how to keep secrets can help you. You can carefully ask the future bride herself about this. If she wears rings, you can secretly measure the circumference of one of them. It won't hurt you to take into account the following nuances:
- Choose a ring for your ring finger. The middle finger is thicker.
- On the right hand, the circumference of the ring finger is 0.3 mm larger than on the left.
- When put on, the ring passes through a joint that is wider than the base.
What to look for when choosing an engagement ring
To create a strong Orthodox family, of course, it is better to choose a modest but beautiful ring. There are many aspects to consider when choosing. The main thing is to listen to the wishes of your other half. What metal does she like best, what stones, and perhaps color. Is she a romantic person, or does she like something newfangled? What is her profession, what are her personal hobbies. It is better to collect information very unobtrusively and not in one day, otherwise the entire conspiracy will be declassified.
In addition to size, there are some other issues to consider. Such as budget, metal, type of stone, overall design.
What budget should you expect?
It is believed that the ring should symbolize the man’s well-being and show how dear the woman is to him. Fortunately, now you can find a huge number of all kinds of rings that will fit any wallet, from simple and symbolic to fabulously expensive.
In the West, traditionally, an engagement ring should cost as much as a man earns in a month or two. However, we urge you not to follow fashion and rely on your own strength. For some, a thousand rubles is a lot of money, and it’s not worth spending it to buy an engagement ring at an incredible price. The Church does not condemn anyone for spending a small amount of money on a ring, and for God everyone is equal. The main thing is not material wealth, but spiritual wealth. Especially if you have found a worthy life partner and she shares your views.
But if there is an opportunity to please a girl, then why not give her a worthy ring as a gift. Moreover, there are also more than enough options in the middle price segment. There is no need to spend what you cannot afford, take out loans or installments. But you shouldn’t be greedy or present yourself as a miser. It is best to adhere to moderation in everything - the golden rule that always works reliably and righteously.
What material to choose for the ring
Traditionally, it is customary for a proposal ring to be made of the precious metal gold. However, pure 999 gold is not the best option for a ring - it is very soft and brittle. Therefore, it is better to choose 750 sample, which uses an alloy with silver and copper. Thanks to different proportions, different colors of gold can be achieved. For example, 585 standard, due to the high admixture of copper, has a very beautiful pinkish tint. And if you add nickel or palladium to gold, it will turn into the now very popular white gold.
Which of these options to choose, you will have to decide for yourself. You can find out in advance and carefully what type of gold your chosen one prefers or get your bearings by the types of jewelry that she usually wears. If a girl categorically stated that she considers all types of gold, except classic gold, to be simply terrible, then it immediately becomes clear what she should choose.
A more expensive metal for an engagement ring is platinum, which with its grayish tint always sets off diamonds very favorably.
If a girl wears only silver and categorically does not like gold, then it is permissible to purchase a silver engagement ring.
Question about the stone
A proposal ring must have a gemstone, but not everyone is suitable for this important mission. The best and classic option is, of course, a diamond.
The main characteristics of a diamond that are worth paying attention to:
- carats – they measure the weight of a diamond (1 carat = 0.2 g);
- purity - means whether the stone has defects or inclusions;
- cut option.
The size of the stone can be any: small, neat, and quite weighty. It's worth looking at depending on the circumstances. Remember that a stone that is too large will be uncomfortable to wear, especially in winter when gloves are worn.
In addition to the classic diamond, you can choose a multi-colored diamond, sapphire, and emerald.
Design
Engagement rings come in a variety of designs. A classic option is a gold bezel with a diamond in a beautiful frame. However, there are hundreds of other species. The presence of two, three, or even a scattering of small stones is allowed. Based on the number of stones, several main forms can be distinguished:
- with one stone;
- one stone in a halo of small pebbles;
- with two stones (symbolizing two hearts that are now beating in unison);
- with three stones (this symbolically conveys the past, present and future of the couple).
If we talk about style, you can find classic, vintage, ethnic, fancy, original and exclusive rings. For believers, it would be appropriate to choose an Orthodox ring as a gift, for example, with the inscription “Save and Preserve” inside or with a cross. By doing this, you will emphasize the importance of faith and prayer in the life of your future family and invite God’s blessing on your marriage.
But this is not the main thing: the girl will say: “Yes!” not at all because of the size of the stone or the wonderful cut, but because it shares your feelings!
